My step-dad's interview was basically divided into two parts, one discussing him as the non-custodial parent and the other half about him becoming step-father:
Non-Custodial Parent
Run me through your initial reaction to being separated from your children by the divorce:
It was completely heartbreaking. It left me devastated. I never imagined that my children would have to grow up without their father like I did. This was the last thing I wanted for my children.
How difficult was it to maintain meaningful relationships with your children even though you didn't see them often?
It is very difficult because every time you see them you have to play catch-up and gain some trust back over the first half of the time you spend with them. It is an obvious disadvantage because there is a level of closeness and comfort that is lacking that comes from seeing them on an everyday basis.
Elaborate on the disadvantage you felt:
"The custodial parent gets to see the children every single day, and that builds up rapport between them. It is hard for me to expect them to see me once every other weekend but still be as open as they would be with an everyday parent. I also have to miss out on the little things, like when they lost a tooth or had a fever, just small events that helps show my care and love for them. It is difficult to show them that with such a distant relationship or over the phone.
Step-father
How hard was fitting in to a new family?
"It was incredibly difficult, way harder than I expected. I thought I was the missing puzzle piece and would just plug right in, but that was not the case whatsoever. My first step was trying to find the role I needed to play, I didn't know where I fit in."
What do you mean "fit in?"
"Well, like I was just saying, the first thing I had to do was find my role in the family. I quickly came to realize that I needed to be trying to pick up their weaknesses, not impose my strengths."
Last thoughts on being a step-father:
"It not as simple as one would assume, but when you have the privilege of being the step father to great kids it is easy to show them love and love them as if they were your own children."
Non-Custodial Parent
Run me through your initial reaction to being separated from your children by the divorce:
It was completely heartbreaking. It left me devastated. I never imagined that my children would have to grow up without their father like I did. This was the last thing I wanted for my children.
How difficult was it to maintain meaningful relationships with your children even though you didn't see them often?
It is very difficult because every time you see them you have to play catch-up and gain some trust back over the first half of the time you spend with them. It is an obvious disadvantage because there is a level of closeness and comfort that is lacking that comes from seeing them on an everyday basis.
Elaborate on the disadvantage you felt:
"The custodial parent gets to see the children every single day, and that builds up rapport between them. It is hard for me to expect them to see me once every other weekend but still be as open as they would be with an everyday parent. I also have to miss out on the little things, like when they lost a tooth or had a fever, just small events that helps show my care and love for them. It is difficult to show them that with such a distant relationship or over the phone.
Step-father
How hard was fitting in to a new family?
"It was incredibly difficult, way harder than I expected. I thought I was the missing puzzle piece and would just plug right in, but that was not the case whatsoever. My first step was trying to find the role I needed to play, I didn't know where I fit in."
What do you mean "fit in?"
"Well, like I was just saying, the first thing I had to do was find my role in the family. I quickly came to realize that I needed to be trying to pick up their weaknesses, not impose my strengths."
Last thoughts on being a step-father:
"It not as simple as one would assume, but when you have the privilege of being the step father to great kids it is easy to show them love and love them as if they were your own children."